I wonder if the people who came up with these ads fall into the the S category.

* Lost: small apricot poodle. reward. Neutered. Like one of the
family.

* A superb and inexpensive restaurant. Fine foods expertly served by
waitresses in apetizing forms.

* Dinner Special - Turkey $2.35; Chicken or Beef $2.25; Children $2.00

* For sale: antique desk suitable for lady with thick legs and large
drawers.

* Now is the perfect time to get your ears pierced and get an extra pair
to take home, too!

* Wanted: 50 girls for stripping machine operators in factory

* Wanted: Unmarried girls to pick fresh fruit and produce at night.

* We do not tear your clothing with machinery. We do it carefully by
hand.

* Creative daily specials, including select offerings of beef, foul,
fresh vegetables, salads, quiche.

* Have several very old dresses from grandmother in beautiful condition.

* Tired of cleaning yourself? Let me do it. (This one is my favorite)

* Dog for sale: eats anything and is fond of children.

* The hotel has bowling alleys, tennis courts, comfortable beds and
other athletic facilities.

* Get rid of aunts: Zap does the job in 24 hours.

* Sheer stockings. Designed for fancy dress, but so servicable that lots
of women wear nothing else.

* Man, honest. Will take anything.

* Wanted: chambermaid in rectory. Love in, $200.00 a month.
References required.

* Used Cars: Why go elsewhere to be cheated? Come here first!

* Modular Sofas. Only $299.00. For rest or fore play.

* Wanted. Man to take care of cow that does not smoke or drink.

* 3-year old teacher needed for pre-school. Experience preferred.

* Our bikinis are exciting. They are simply the tops.

* See ladies blouses. 50% off!

* Illiterate? Write today for free help.

* Girl wanted to assist magician in cutting-off-head illusion.
Blue Cross and salary.

* Wanted. Widower with school-age children requires person to assume
general housekeeping duties. Must be capable of contributing to
growth of family.

* Mixing bowl set designed to please a cook with round bottom for
efficient beating

* Mother's helper - peasant working conditions..

* We will oil your sewing machine and adjust tension in your home
for $1.00