The Happy Side of Tears

There have only been a few times (that clearly stand out) that I have cried from sheer happiness and joy. It is a completely different feeling than crying from sadness. When crying from sadness, my body quivers/shakes, I whimper, I usually have heartache. However, when overjoyed to the extend that I come to tears, well, let's just say that ecstasy consumes me and washes over me at the specific moment. Almost like you've experienced so much pleasure, the only release there is, is crying.

#1: The moment I heard Malcolm's heartbeat. I was 10 weeks pregnant and Mr. J was unable to come to the appointment. It was my first real pre-natal appointment and I really didn't know what to expect. I surely wasn't expecting the Dr. to check for the baby's heartbeat. Because it was still fairly early, she warned me that we probably wouldn't hear it. After a couple of minutes of her sliding the fetal doppler over my belly, we heard the heartbeat loud and clear and strong. I instantly became overwhelmed with emotion and began to cry. Still, after this long, I get emotional when I speak of it.

#2: October 23, 2009, the birth of our son, Master K. Upon seeing my son for the 1st time, I was completely taken over by happiness and awesomeness. To finally see, in the flesh, this perfect little person Mr. J and I had created, the little person we had waited so long to meet, it was beyond my imagination; beyond words.

#3: October 3, 2010, Master K looked at me and said 'Mama' as clear as can be. I welled up with tears and hugged him tight. I can't even begin to explain my feelings.

I'm sure I will have many more happy tears in years to come. Sadly, I will likely have sad tears when it comes to Master K. I can only imagine how I will feel when he goes to the dayhome in a few weeks, when he starts kindergarten, says his first mean word to me or leaves home a grown man.

One day at a time. Enjoying every moment happy or sad.

Poops, Pees, Spits - A Mother's Father's Life!

I fully expected to be the recipient of most of Master K's 'accidents', yet somehow I've missed out on most of them - not that I'm sad about that, just a little surprised. Luckily, Mr. J seems to be on the receiving end.

We had an unfortunate puking 'accident' a few weeks back - of course, Mr. J was playing with him shortly after he ate and somehow, was unaware that bouncing and jostling Master K around may result in some spit up. It did...and it was unpleasant. I missed the said 'accident', so I heard about it later.

Master K hasn't done a lot of peeing on either myself or Mr. J, yet when it has happened, Mr. J has gotten the brunt of it.

And just the other night, during Master K's nightly bath, he decided to poop in the tub. It happened to be Mr. J's turn at the nighttime routine, but I helped 'Daddy' out. As I was cleaning out the tub, Master K found it timely to pee on Mr. J. I just giggled.

There are many more years to come, so I'm sure Master K and I will have our share of 'accidents' together.

Mother's Day

Today is my 1st Mother's Day.  Although we did celebrate last year when Master K was in utero, it feels a little more real this year.


Master K is the light of my life - he makes me smile, laugh, cry, worry....every emotion in the world.  I could not have asked for a more precious child.  I love him with all my heart.  He is my life.

Being a mother is the most wonderful thing that has ever happened to me.  I never really understood when mothers said, 'you'll never know until you become a mother' or 'a child will completely change your life' or 'you don't understand; you don't have kids' or 'you'll feel differently when you have kids.'  I honestly didn't think children affected your life THAT MUCH!

Now, I know better!  Parents say these things to singles or childless parents because it really is that hard to explain how you will feel, react, or behave once a child becomes part of your life.

It is amazing, fantastic, wonderful, stressful, tasking, frustration - yet so rewarding.

I love motherhood, I love my husband, I love our family, and I love my precious son.

Flexibility is a MUST

After only 6.5 months of raising a child I should know that the best laid plans rarely turn out.  Not that we had big plans today, but we were going to head out for lunch with an ex-co-worker of Mr. J's.  Sadly, Master K had a bad night, woke up early, and had a very short morning nap.  Consequently, we had to cancel our lunch plans with our friend.  Also, (not surprisingly) Master K is having a difficulty time napping today.  I'm almost certain he is overtired. 

Mr. J is going out to see Iron Man 2 this evening with a friends, so it's just me and the little guy.  It could be a rough night if he doesn't have a long nap this afternoon.

I need to just go with the flow, in spite of being tired and cranky.

How my web surfing has changed since becoming a mom.

An interesting new blog I stumbled upon:

The Feminist Breeder

Our son's blanket

Apparently the only baby blanket I can finish on time is our sons - imagine that! We'll that isn't exactly true, I think I finished the blanket for Zeda on time and the sweater for Eamon on time. But that's it.

I used a really simple pattern, so it really didn't take that long. Plus, I had used the same pattern for the last 2 blankets that I knit this winter for my girlfriends, so I was a pro by the time I got to our sons.

It is fashioned in the 3 primary colours - classically used on superheroes. I did not attempt any special designs, as I am not that skilled.

Preparations

Things are moving along quite smoothly in preparing for our new family member. We've spent the last number of weeks preparing the house, starting/finishing renovations and purchasing various baby items.

We've got our garage mostly built. There are just a few final touches that need to be complete, and then we can officially start using it. We painted the baby's room last weekend, so now we are just waiting on the furniture to arrive. We purchased a playpen and stroller and are off to get the carseat this weekend. We also plan to start shopping for a new vehicle this weekend, as our 2-door car will not do.

Things left to do: finish the fence and stain it; finish the baby's room - styling it just right with our superhero sketches, pictures and busts; organize the basement and move a bunch of stuff into the garage; wait for our son to arrive.

It's going to be a very busy 2 months and 29 days - not only at home, but at work too. I am glad my family is coming to visit next month - I think I'll put my mom to work cleaning my house, and I'm sure Mr. J could use a hand with the fence. We'll take any help we can get, as our family support network is fairly thin here - we pretty much just have friends around.

It's a Boy!!!

The 'Hero' themed nursery is going to be perfect. Now we just have to start work on it. With all the artist sketches we have and Daddy J's DC busts, we're set!

I can't wait to meet our son! I am SO excited!